Hello From Rockville

I went to be with Harlan, got there about 2:30. He got his flu shot this morning and I guess he was upset and wouldn't eat breakfast or dinner. I took him to gas-up the car and we got a car wash and because he hadn't eaten anything today we went for pizza (I was able to skip supper), he ate well. I needed a few things at the grocery store, we stopped there then back to the VA and a nap. When I left to go home he did go down the hall for supper. On the way home I discovered I had left my cell phone on his window sill I turned around and Harlan was still eating and didn't see me return. He seemed a little down today and rebelled at taking his neb machine. Tomorrow I'm taking friends from here and going to Crosslake just to see where we lived in Crosslake, the building here was copied from Crosslake. It's suppose to rain tomorrow but I hope it's just showers. I'll let you know how tomorrow goes when I write again........Fran

Hello From Rockville

Today was Harlan's birthday. We went to Anton's for ribs, their ribs are great. Anton's topped Harlan's dinner off with a free dessert, a large brownie topped with ice cream and chocolate sauce, very good and too much for Harlan to eat by himself and besides they brought it in with two spoons.

When I got to the VA to pick up Harlan for lunch I noticed his glasses were really mishapped and when he tried to read the menu at Anton's he couldn't, that called for a trip to the optometry department for some TLC on his glasses. When we got back to the VA after lunch the lab had stopped to do a blood draw, a once monthly procedure to check his hemoglobin. When we went to get his glasses fixed we were not far from the lab and went there instead of having a technician track Harlan down for his blood draw.

Harlan and I had a good day together and we topped the day off with a nap, I was so tired I slept but I'm not sure Harlan did.

So until tomorrow have a good night's sleep........Fran

Hello From Rockville

Here fall has come in with a BANG, cool and windy, today our highs were in the 50's and tonight may be cold enough for frost. I had a few tomatoes I brought in, it seems I just planted them, and I picked what may be the last of the beans. I also took my hanging basket and my fern inside and unless it gets warm again I'll just keep them in.

They are working on the street near the church we attend and the street will be closed for the month of October, I needed to explore a way to get to church. When I went in to see Harlan we went for a drive and did find a way to get to church that I'll be comfortable with. The route I took took us near Perkins, I drove in and Harlan didn't want anything, he does not feel good I think allergies are making him feel lousy, we went back to the VA and we took a nap. He is taking his neb using the mouth piece, he seems to be doing okay with it.

'till I write again Good Night.......Fran

Hello From Rockville

Today was to be Sue's return to Georgia, because of the weather she in spending the night at Becky's and will get into Atlanta some time tomorrow. We had a good time while she was here and we were busy.

Today we took Harlan to church and out for lunch at AJ'S where we were joined by the Platzer's, Rick, DeeAnn, Kelsey, Sarah and Wes. We went back to the VA and Sarah picked Sue up at the VA and took her to the airport where she spent a lot of time before getting to Mpls.

The day went well for Harlan, he is having some problems with his breathing, today they tried something new, they are trying a mouth piece on his neb machine instead of a mask, we hope it will go better for him. He'll be able to keep his glasses on, I think he may be happier doing it this way at least for now. Before his surgery while he was home he always used a mouth piece not a mask on his neb machine.

Time to retire for the night.....Fran

Hello From Rockville

What a fun day!!! The Grahams (2), the Platzers(5), the Cafferys (4), The Cumminses (3), and Mrs. Stine (1) helped me celebrate my birthday, it was great! We had great food and it's so much fun to see four generations together. Harlan was missing as it just doesn't work to bring him here he gets so depressed when he has to return, I sure wish it wasn't that way. I spent several hours with him and Becky, Walt, Kristen and Luke went to see him, we took him to McD for an ice cream cone and coffee. He is haveing a difficult time and seems so down.

Tomorrow Sue leaves, I'll miss her, we've had a good time with her and as all good times end so must this but there's always next year.

Tomorrow is church we'll go and do lunch after, so until tomorrow good night....Fran

Hello From Rockville

The day started with a visit from Ed, he brought donuts and Sue and I had coffee and donuts with him. He went down the hall to visit Harold and Marilyn and Sue and I took off for Cold Spring and the Purse Store, with a stop at the bakery, good stuff there!!! The next stop was to the grocery store and home. We got our roast in the oven and took off for St. Cloud, Waltmart and The Dollar Tree.

When we stopped to see Harlan he seemed very confused, he felt his mind was "foggy" and he could not explain how he felt. When I talked to the nurses they told me he had eaten both breakfast and dinner and also had a good nights sleep. When they checked his "vitals" everything checked okay- BP, temp, heart rate and oxygen level, he just wasn't himself. We took him for a treat, coffee and ice cream at Culver's and that didn't even perk him up.

We went back to the VA, Sue left, Harlan got his meds we laid down for a rest time and he was sleeping in no time. Maybe yesterday was too exhausting for him, he had a busy day.

Tonight Sue and I went for frog legs at Coyote Moon a golf course east of St. Cloud. The food was great and we really ate too much, tonight should be good sleeping we're both tired, and tomorrow is another day..........Fran

Hello From Rockville

Hope everyone reading this had a wonderful day, this is daughter Sue writing for Mom this evening, we had a very full day and was very good. As you know today was Mom's birthday which started at 6 am with a call from Harlan. We headed over to the VA around 9:15 or so as I wanted to take Dad shopping to buy Mom a birthday card and present. After our little shopping we went for coffee as it was too early to head to lunch. After our coffee we headed over to Antons for lunch where Denese surprised us. She actually was talking to Mom as we pulled into the parking lot then talked to me after parking the car, I hung up the phone and got ready to get out and there Denese was standing. The food was good and we had plenty to eat. Then we headed back to the Va for a rest. After a short rest we went out to eat a treat at Perkins, Dad had his favorite pie. Then back to the VA where Denese and I said goodbye to Dad and Mom stayed with him until dinner. Mom meet up with Denese and I we did a little shopping and then home for the evening. Was a full day tomorrow won't be as busy which will be nice for all of us. Don't know how they do it I am exhausted. Thanks everyone for your thoughts/cards on Mom's birthday. Till tomorrow take care.

Hello From Rockville

DeeAnn and Sarah picked Sue up at the St. Cloud airport, I met them at Applebees for lunch. Sue had not been to The Depot, a store at the intersection of 23 and 94, a fun place to look but I haven't seen any thing I couldn't live without we spent time shopping then on Rockville to dispose of Sue's luggage.

We went into The VA to see Harlan, Sue went in to his room first and he was sleeping, she woke him up but he said he wanted to sleep more and she could come back in an hour to visit. He was very tired, he did not sleep much last night, tonight should be better. We did a little shopping, picked up coffee and went back to see him. He had looked forward to getting away but when we returned it was too close to his supper, we hung around and visited. He had a hard time trying to understand why we couldn't take him out, time is difficult for him to understand and he just did not understand there wasn't enough time. Sue and I left when he went to supper.

Tomorrow we'll take him out for dinner and spend most of the day with him, we'll have a good time with him.........Fran

Hello From Rockville

Today was a fun and busy day. I was in St. Cloud at Applebees by 11:15 to meet Myrna, Marianne and Sue, we celebrated Marianne's and my birthday (mine a little early). The staff at Applebees sang us a Happy Birthday song and gave us a dessert, we shared the dessert! I left in time to get to Cold Spring by 12:15 to meet Mark and Betty for lunch at The Red River Inn. After lunch it was on to the Dr. for a follow-up on my Sunday trip to the ER. Everything is going okay. Mark, Betty and I came back here to enjoy a cup of coffee and apple crisp before heading to the VA to spend time with Harlan. We took Harlan to Perkins and had various things to drink and shared onion rings then they left for home and we went back to the VA. Because of the change in the day with Harlan (we got there around 4) he is having a hard time this evening. He told me he didn't know where to "Park his Carcass" I told him to just lay down and rest as his breathing is labored, a bad time of the year for him and he said his feet were cold. if he gets his feet off of the floor it should help.

Tomorrow Sue flies in to St. Cloud and between me, Sarah and DeeAnn we'll get her picked up from the airport. We'll have a good time while she's here, she leaves Sunday and we have lots to pack in while she's here.

Good Night...Fran

Hello From Rockville

Almost every morning I meet Harold and Marilyn in the Sun Room, we have devotions using the Daily Bread, sometimes one of us is busy with a Dr. appointment or some other commitment and it doesn't work but it is good to start the day reading the Bible. We read, discuss and pray not long and not very formal and sometimes we talk about other things but I feel it's good for all of us, I wish more would join us as Harold and Marilyn are moving, I will miss them.

I had called the nurse's station yesterday (Sunday AM) to tell them I would not be in to take Harlan to church and the word did not get around, I don't think he got the support he should have gotten and because he could not get a hold me while I was in ER he had a very difficult time, his imagination got the best of him and he was very worried about me. When Rick, Adam and Kelsey took him to McD he was so upset and could not be comforted, it was so hard on them. He readily agreed to go to McD but I think maybe he expected to see me there, and just didn't know how to express his feelings when I wasn't there.

Today was back to normal, I spent time with Him, we went grocery shopping, I needed a few things, then on to Perkins for a treat and back to the VA, he did all his meds and then went to supper and I went home. Perkins sent cookies home with both of us, oh how they spoil us, but I love it, so until tomorrow, Good Night...Fran

Hello From Rockville

Today being Sunday I always take Harlan to church, today was different. I spent a good part of the day in ER. Rick came in and took me, I had an attack of Diverticulitis and now I am on a very strong antibiotic, this will be for 10 days. When I don't go into see Harlan he has a very hard time as he just does not understand what is happening. I went in the morning and left ER at about 5:30, DeeAnn took me in to see Harlan and he was so happy to see me. I had talked to him on the phone but I could not convince him I was okay, only seeing me in person satisfied him. Tomorrow will be a normal day!

This is short I'll try to write more tomorrow......Fran

Hello From Rockville

I got a call from Myrna this morning and she is coming to St. Cloud and wants to meet me and Mariann (Pappenhousen sp?), Jim's cousin, for lunch on Tuesday, if it works for me I'll do that. Mariann's 80th and mine are just days apart, like I say if it works that will be fun. I have another commitment on Monday or Tuesday which has priority, it seems everything seems to work out.

I had a good day with Harlan, we went to Culver's and had a hamburger and fries, we had fun together with conversation and laughs. He seems to be better with his depression. I took him to play bingo on his floor, I feel it helps keep his brain working looking for numbers and covering them. He didn't win and that's okay he is not there to win just to do something, he spends a lot of time in his room so when I can get him out I do.

I talked to DeeAnn tonight, she thought Rick and the kids may come up tomorrow and join us for lunch, Harlan enjoys time with the family. Several weeks ago when Sarah and Rick joined us for church Harlan was so excited, he didn't want to change clothes before we ate.

Today was good and God is so good he takes care of us, and gives us so much special time together, so until tomorrow Good Night.......Fran

Hello From Rockville

This AM DeeAnn called and wished us a Happy Anniversary and there were two cards taped to the hall door, aren't special days fun?

I went into the VA to meet with the dementia support group, there were only three of us and two facilitators, a very small group. The meeting is an hour long so at two I joined Harlan and we went to Perkins for our treat, he had a grilled cheese sandwich and I had a cup of soup and we both had coffee. Harlan was having a hard time today one reason was I didn't answer the phone while I was at the meeting and I think he felt abandoned. After getting back from Perkins we laid down and talked about a lot of things, pets he had, how it was growing up, things we had etc. I think he was feeling okay when I left. About 4:30 Pastor and Mrs. Campbell stopped to see Harlan, brought a card and some beautiful tomatoes. They are so encouraging and upbeat. Pastor read scripture and Mrs. Campbell prayed, a nice end to a good day. Harlan enjoys seeing them and is comfortable giving him a hard time.

My day ended with a call from Becky, she told me Luke is doing well in school and seems to be adjusting to going to school, a big step for him. Pray that school goes well for him and it's not too difficult for him to handle.

That's about it until tomorrow.........Fran

Hello From Rockville

Another beautiful sunny and extra warm day, a wee bit too warm I'd say.

Today was a good day. I received a phone call from Pastor's wife Mary asking me if I wanted to go to the one day gathering in the Cities. They have seminars and a lot of very good things, I went two years ago and enjoyed it, but with the hard time Harlan has when I don't keep a routine it is just better I don't go. Everyone says I need to do things for myself and I understand that but when the routine changes for him it's very hard on him and me, I'm very comfortable with the routine I'm in. It's such a joy to go in to see him and see how happy he is to see me and to help him with some of his needs and I do enjoy our time out for our treats.

Today I spent time with him, a treat at Perkins, a cookie and hot chocolate for him and coffee and a cookie for me.

I left the VA a little early as we had our pot luck social tonight which is at 6:00, again good food and good fellowship.

Harlan called just after I got back from the pot luck wanting to know what to watch on TV, I suggested Millionaire there just is nothing and he has a hard time following a movie or any kind of sports.

I see his mood as being better, I really think that the antidepressant is helping him, then again only time will tell.

Until tomorrow have a Good Night......Fran

Hello From Rockville

I started the day working at church, got there at 9:00. Mary and I trimmed and counted Campbell's and Box Tops for Education labels and when we get together next time we'll get them sent off. We worked until noon.

DeeAnn called me, we made plans to meet for lunch along with Sarah and Kelsey. Our choice for food was at Five Guys, they have great hamburgers and what's great about it you can have anything added to your hot dog or hamburger that suits your fancy. They also have great fries, the four of us enjoyed 1 small order and it was really more then we needed.

After eating the Girls left and DeeAnn and I went to look at recliners, mine is starting to look so shabby, we went to Slumberland and I did find one. I had to order it and will get in about 6 weeks.

We then went to see Harlan, he was in a good mood, I think the antidepressant is starting to help, he lets me know he would like to leave there but he is not as teary eyed when he talks about leaving as he has been. Out treat today was a sundae at McD with a cup of coffee.

He called me several times complaining of difficulty in breathing, I called the desk and they said they would check on him, before I go to bed I'll call him and see how he is doing.

Good Night until tomorrow......Fran

Hello From Rockville
Another beautiful day but it sounds like it will be coming to an end on Monday, but that will only be a slight cool down.
Harlan called me this forenoon, I answered the phone and his response was "Howdy", it really surprised me. I hope his light hearted response tells me he feels better emotionally, but one never knows. In the same conversation he said he hadn't seen me for several days and he missed me. When I went in he said he didn't feel good and just had no energy but we did go to Perkins for our treat, we split a piece of their new Oreo Cheese Cake Pie. It was good but next time I'd have a piece by myself. Harlan had hot chocolate and I had coffee. The manager gave him a cookie to take back with him to eat later, they are so good to him at Perkins.
I did a little shopping but did not take Harlan with me because he was tired and he is having difficulty with allergies and asthma.
Today was a good day...Fran

Hello From Rockville

Another beautiful day and now a great sunset.

I spent time with Harlan but before seeing him I went to a meeting concerning his care at the VA. There are a lot of people that are involved with his care that meet together every three months. Nurse Pauline felt that there are subtle changes in Harlan's behavior for the good and I feel that there are some too. He doesn't seem as teary eyed, but then that may be today and not tomorrow. The dietitian commented on his response to corn beef, "He'd never eat that stuff ever again!" She assured him he wouldn't have to.

We went to Sam's Club, I needed calcium and coffee then he wanted pizza again, we stopped and stuffed our selves. After eating all the pizza we could Harlan decided he'd had enough pizza for a while, maybe a week or a month and we needed to go some where else for our treat and we will.

When we got back to the VA we took a nap and it was so cute, he said "I watched you sleep and then I fell asleep too." After that it was his supper time and time for me to go, until tomorrow, Good Night......Fran

Hello From Rockville
Another beautiful day.
Harlan and I went to church, changed clothes and went to Perkins for lunch. I had written a letter to Perkins because of an incident concerning a dirty coffee cup, I receives an apology about it and they had enclosed two coupons for free breakfasts, we used one today.
After lunch we returned to the VA (Harlan under protest) took a nap and read the paper. We had a good day, until tomorrow, Good Night.....Fran

Hello From Rockville

The weather is just beautiful, for me it can stay this way until Christmas and then snow a little and warm up again. We have turned off our watering system so if the grass is to get water it has to come from above.

Today I got a phone call from Rick, he wanted us to join him and Sarah for a bite to eat. When I got to the VA I met one of the staff going on break and he said that Harlan had looked at his lunch tray and said, "I wouldn't touch that meal with a 10 foot pole," and he didn't eat. We met Sarah and Rick for pizza, we enjoyed it down to the last crumb. After the pizza I took Sarah home and Rick went to check on Kelsey's car. Just before it was time for Harlan to go to supper Rick stopped , Harlan's comment on that was "We've sure seen a lot of Rick this week!" It was true, last Sunday he and Sarah joined us at church then for lunch after church and twice today. The day ended on a happy note, it was a good day and tomorrow is church so that will be a good day too........Fran

Hello From Rockville

Harlan called me just before I left for St. Cloud, he complained that he was having a difficult time breathing, I asked him if he had been taking his meds and neb he told me no one had given him anything to take. Before I got to the VA he called me again complaining of difficulty with breathing. When I got there I checked his neb machine and it didn't appear that he had taken very much of it, I turned it on and he took what was left in the machine. I went to the desk and asked about his meds and I was told he had refused them and hadn't taken any today which would include his antidepressant as he takes that in the morning, he had also refused his meds last night. He just does not understand how important the medication he takes is to keep him as healthy as possible. He does get upset when his breathing becomes difficult. We did not leave the building for our daily treat, he didn't feel up to it. By the time I went home he was feeling better and I think it was because he had taken his neb machine twice while I was there. I find that when his daily routine is changed he has a very hard time the rest of the day and over night and yesterday I changed it so I could have the boat ride and steak dinner. These days are hard on all of us, the staff, him and me, tomorrow will be better!!!..........Fran

Hello From Rockville

I went into spend time with Harlan. Today was a special day at the VA, they had out door activities, music, food representing various countries in the world and fun things to do. I did take Harlan out for about 45 minuets then I had to leave.

I went in early as I was invited to go on a pontoon ride around the lakes and dinner, I had to be back home and ready to leave before 2:30. We went on the chain of lakes out of Cold Spring, it was a beautiful day, sunny and warm. We had snacks and pop on the pontoon and a steak dinner when we got back. I saw some beautiful homes, I'm sure the taxes were out of sight! It brought back happy memories of Crosslake and peaceful pontoon rides on O'Brien Lake.

I knew Harlan would have a hard time because his scheduled time with me was goofed up, I received several phone calls from him this evening and he expressed his sadness. I think the evenings are the hardest for him, this is referred to as "Sun Downers" and it affects people with memory loss.

I have given him several pillows as he doesn't like the VA pillows, tonight he told me I should take the pillows home as he doesn't want the VA to have them, I told him to remind tomorrow and I'd take them home then. Tomorrow he will not remember the conversation we had tonight.

Tomorrow should be good day, I'll see Harlan and do things with him as a normal day.........Fran

Hello From Rockville
I started my blog and some how lost it. Here it goes again.
Today my cleaning Lady shaped up my place and I washed clothes, two jobs that needed to be done.
I went to see Harlan and when we got there we were told someone had brought birthday cake and ice cream, strawberry and vanilla and because September birthdays were being celebrated we had cake and ice cream, very good cake. I think there were 5 or 6 men with September birthdays, Harlan seemed to enjoy the birthday time. Each birthday person got 4 quarters ($1.00) which he promptly put in his coin purse. Even with the cake and ice cream he wanted to get away, we took a trip to Perkins and had a serving of onion rings. We decided we would not have them again. Harlan had hot chocolate, he likes that better then Perkins coffee and me, I had decaf. We had a good time together and I think the antidepressant has started to help, he has taken it since Sunday, he seemed more energetic. I was told not to get my hopes up too much as it may not help at all, but I am hopeful.
When I called him this evening he was doing his neb, last night he would not do anything they asked him to do and he wouldn't listen to me either.
I look forward to our time together tomorrow, until then Good Night..........Fran

Hello From Rockville

I got my hair cut this morning then back here in time to pick up the mail and then to our board meeting.

I spent the afternoon with Harlan. He so enjoyed the pizza yesterday we went back today and it was just as good today as yesterday. We were next door to K-Mart so made a quick stop there and then to the grocery store for a few items. We got back to the VA in time for Harlan to go for supper and I went home but first he gave me a hard time as he wants me to take him home, I just can't, I've been told by the VA that there is no way I could care for him. I find these departures very hard. I also got a call from the meds nurse tonight asking me if I'd try and get him to take his meds, he refused her and I could not talk him into taking his meds either, these are important meds, his inhalers, BP meds and an aid to help him sleep, also his new antidepressant. He just plain said NO! We hope tomorrow is better, until then Good Night....Fran

Hello From Rockville

I needed to fill the car with gas, we went to Fleet Farm then instead of Perkins or McD for our afternoon treat we went to Pizza Ranch. It's where Out Back used to be near K-Mart. We both enjoyed the pizza and with a drink and a senior discount it was much cheaper then pie and coffee at Perkins. You order what you want and like Culver's you get a number and it's delivered to your table or booth. They have a buffet which closes at 2:00 that I'd like to try, we were too late to try it today.

The day went well, we had a good time together. He called several times this evening wanting to know what to watch on TV and there really isn't much, with his attention span it's even harder to find something for him to watch if the Twins are on one or two innings is about all he wants to watch.

I get a hair cut tomorrow at 8:00 then we have our board meeting at 10:00.

Will talk again tomorrow........Fran

Hello From Rockville

Harlan and I went to church and were surprised when Rick and Sarah joined us. After church Harlan and I went back to the VA and changed into more comfortable clothes then joined Rick and Sarah for Chinese food at China Star Buffet, oh so good! On weekends they have shrimp fixed many different ways, we enjoyed good food and good fellowship. From there Rick and Sarah headed to the St. Cloud house, Rick to cut grass and Sarah to study and we went back to the VA. I read the paper and then we took a nap. He is having such a hard time, the staff really don't know what to do to get him to take his meds or his neb machine, he usually will cooperate with me but right now I don't have much influence on him, sure hope the new medication will help him. After that it was time to go home and Harlan went to supper, so until tomorrow good night......Fran

Hello From Rockville

DeeAnn called me this morning to see if we could get together over dinner, good idea and it worked out.

I did laundry before I went in to see Harlan, he is having a difficult time and I don't think his new antidepressant will start until after Labor Day so he has to wait several more days for help. The medication he is on has been dropped from 80 mg to only 20 mg and that's much too low. He is aware that he has a problem and he does not like it. He played bingo and again he plays well missing very few numbers. After bingo we went for a drive around the back side of the VA near the river, it is so peaceful and pretty back there. Before we left one of the staff asked Harlan where we were going, and Harlan told them we were going to take turns pushing each other into the river, I don't know if they believed him but Paula says, "Do you know the paper work involved if something happens?". Harlan was only kidding, we had a great time back there. We then went to Culver's for ice cream, we shared a banana split. We went back to the VA and, Harlan did his meds, we visited and just before supper Rick stopped, Harlan enjoyed seeing him, then off to supper. I joined Rick, DeeAnn, Sarah and Wes for dinner at Antons, we had good food and a fun time together and we then separated and I came home.

Tomorrow is another day and Harlan and I will go to Church until then good night!..........Fran

Hello From Rockville

This is Labor Day Week-end, kind of the end of Summer. It has been a cool summer and in areas of Minnesota it has been dry, here in the St. Cloud area the corn and soy beans look good but we do need a longer fall as the corn is so green and needs more time to mature before we get frost. .

This morning I went into church and worked with Mary on trimming and counting Box Tops for Education, we will do this weekly until we get caught up, we worked for 2 hours, Mary's Husband cleaned the sanctuary while we worked.

I went home for lunch then back to the VA to meet with other ladies with spouses with dementia, a very helpful support group. Most of the other wives's husbands are much worse then Harlan. I do gain some helpful information and I knew there are others who have been in my position for a much longer time then I have and how they cope.

While I was with Harlan DeeAnn called me and said Izzie, she is Denese's youngest granddaughter, wanted to talk to me so we chatted but I wasn't sure what she told me.

Harlan is having a hard time and I am hopeful that the new antidepressant will help him. He just doesn't understand why he can't live with me. Today he wanted to "sneak" down the elevator with me and get in my car when it was time for his supper, he just wanted to get out.

We went to Perkins and he had his usual, Apple Carmel pie with ice cream and hot chocolate and I had dinner. When he got the pie he decided that next time he would have a different pie or something else as he is "apple pied out" after all these days of the same thing.

All of you out on the highways drive carefully so we can continue to keep in touch. Have a great week-end and stay safe..........Fran

Hello From Rockville

Today was a very good day. I didn't get any thing done here today but then again there is always day after tomorrow to get things done.

This morning I made a banner for our birthday party. The first Thursday of each month we get together for coffee and dessert, the banner had all September names and birthdays listed. It took me three tries to get it right, first I forgot one birthday, on the next try I ran out of colored ink but in end it worked out. We have a sign-up sheet to do the birthday party, the one who signs up sets up, makes coffee, and furnishes the goodies. Some one had put Rachel's name to do the party this month and no one knew who Rachel was (there is no one living here with the name of Rachel), we needed a back-up, I picked up cookies and Mary, Mel and Rale set up and guess what Rachel never showed. We had a good turn out and fun visiting. We use a lot of paper products so dishes are minimal, just cups.

Harlan and I had a good time together, I took him to Perkins for his pie, ice cream and hot chocolate.

His latest thing is he wants to know if we can ever live together, he asked me yesterday and again today. I try changing the subject or skirt around it but that is a very hard question as he just doesn't understand how much memory he has lost and how hard it would be to care for him. It's been 16 months since we shared our home together and he remembers so little of it.

Tomorrow I meet Mary at church at 9:00 to sort and bundle Box Tops for Education and Campbell's labels and at 1:00 there is a support group for spouses of memory loss that meets at the VA. When that is done I'll spend time with Harlan and we'll do our treat some where away from the VA, I should be home a little after 6.

Until tomorrow, good night...........Fran

Hello From Rockville

Today when I went in to see Harlan he was tired and didn't ask to do anything, we spent the time together in his room. We laid down and rested and he complained of having some difficulty with breathing. He had some neb medicine in his machine, we turned it on, the mask wasn't working and I reported that. Ruth came in and monkeyed with it and it seemed to work until she left then it quit so she tried again, no luck and she left to get another mask. I took it apart and got it to work, when she got back because it was working she decided not to give him a new one, I think she should have but then I'm not in charge. Harlan does not understand how important it is to take his breathing machine, it's not an instant help so he doesn't see the importance of it along with the other meds he takes, he almost always gives the meds nurse a hard time when they come around and some of them try to humor him, sometimes it works and some times it doesn't.

Today when I left him I went and did a little shopping, the fabric store, Walmart and the grocery store. He likes to go with me as he feels he helps me by pushing the cart but at times I know it's not that he wants to shop he just like go so he can be with me and get away from the VA. Almost every afternoon when I leave he asks if he can go home with me. It seems to help that he has his supper to go and when he gets back from supper he watches Wheel of Fortune.

When they get his new antidepressant medication going in the correct amount I hope to see some changes, changes that are positive.

Tomorrow should be better, until then - Good Night. Fran

Hello From Rockville

I goofed today, I was supposed to bring Harlan to have his glasses repaired but had put the wrong date on the calendar, I thought it was tomorrow, he got them repaired but they had to scramble to get it done, I really feel bad about that, I hope I never do that again!

I went in to see Harlan and had several places to shop at, I took him along, he felt much better today, much better then yesterday. We went to a fabric store, a dollar store, Sam's club and Bed Bath and Beyond. Before we took our shopping trip we had coffee and fresh chocolate chip cookies at the VA, I brought coffee from home and the cookies were still warm when we ate them, fresh baked in the dinning room on Harlan's floor. They were good, this is something they do every Tuesday.

After all the shopping stops he was ready for a treat. Harlan finally got his ice cream cone, we stopped at McD for our treat, no coffee just ice cream.

I see the Twins won, good for them!

More tomorrow......Fran